Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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What did the shark say to the boat captain? So do you prefer cards or pool?

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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why didnt the whiteperson sit down at obama's election? because he had hemorrhoids

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops