What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? their friend.

What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

whats white jizz

So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

Knock knock knock OCD

How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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