Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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