a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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When you wish upon a star... You are only seeing the light of that star, which has taken billions of years to travel here. The star that you are looking at has most likely dead, Just like your dreams.

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bob lost his camouflage bag. he never found it.

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops