What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

Velcro. What a rip off.

42

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

Who wants water? I do.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

So there is this moose and he goes to a grocery store and asks, "where are the potatoes?" the employee says "aisle 5" and when the moose checks in aisle five, there are no potatoes.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

What's the difference between a cult leader and a television personality? On average, 3.2 inches.

Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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