What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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guess what? bannanas

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you call a mexican who works at a landscaping business? A hard working man who is trying to provide money for his family

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Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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