A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

Q. What is the difference between Jesus and and a picture of Jesus? A. It takes one nail to hang the picture Not trying to offend anyone just a joke to be clear

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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