A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

A mexican, an Aisian, and a black guy are fighting in a dumpster. Who wins? The Mexican, why? Home court advantage!

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

karn chevalier

Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

What do you call a schizophrenic Clown surrounded by 10,000 Amish gangsters, all armed with dildos? I don't know, but it would be a heck of a sight, wouldn't it?

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

kennah campion... being nice

Why did the mother stop breastfeeding her son? Because he was twenty five.

Pianos.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...