Your face is hilarious.

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How does your sister ride a bicycle? My sister does not have any legs.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

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knock knock who's there? faith

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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