Ross.

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

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What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

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why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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What did the guy say when he died? nothing, he was dead

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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