Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

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A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops