Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +8

That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man and his friend go hunting,one falls in a hole and appears dead. The friend calls 911 and asks what to do, the operator says ok first we need to make sure he's dead. The friend checks his pulse and finds out he is living, then an ambulance is sent and the hunter lives with minor injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops