What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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Why was the man sad? His brother died.

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

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All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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