Whats worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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The Charlotte Bobcats

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Knock Knock ... Knock Knock The man proceeds to leave.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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noah is a scrub jungle

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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Why didnt Stevie Wonder wave back at the white man? Because he's a racist.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops