Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

What's funny about a dying dog? Nothing.

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

What if I told you.....potatoe

Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

Why was Nathan upset Because his sister died from an undiagnosed case of tuberculosis

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

Knock knock... Home invasion

Should a pole bump an alarm?

- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

A whole 'nother.

What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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