What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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What's sad about three black men in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? They were my friends.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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What's wrong with you? I have no idea.

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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