A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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12 niqqa 12.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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