why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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WHO'S YO DADDY? the man who's semen combined with your mother's egg to create a child.

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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penis

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trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

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What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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