A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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someone called someone else a frog

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

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what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

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Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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why did the zebra cross the road?

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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All your facts check out, so I sent a little search team to find someone selling us out, it turns that they are after the leader of "The order" and "The king`s throne", so unless you got some small sub-department going on, point zero is in danger, ill explain everything once this is over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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