who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

PENIS lol

Why? Because.

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

Rebecca Black

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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