Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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