Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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rent a cops

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

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What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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