whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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What's the difference between Josef fritsal and a fridge? A fridge can be thrown at a bowl of custard.

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where is the world?

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

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A chicken crosses the road as a car comes by. The driver pumps the brakes and stops the car just before hitting the chicken. The chicken crosses the road safely. Onward, my noble steed !

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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Just admit it. one time in ur life u pretended that the floor was lava and the only way to survive was on the couch.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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Knock Knock Come in

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What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

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They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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