Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

Uncle Eugene enjoyed to drive. Then he was killed in a car crash.

There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

So this guy tells me he hasn't had a bite in weeks. So i bought him lunch.

Jack and Jill went down the hill. And were lost and burnt in hell.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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