A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both fruit. Except the elephant.

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I saw Scarface uncut last weekend. It was called Face

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

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A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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What do you call a woman who can't walk? A paraplegic.

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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