My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Hitler kill himself He saw his gas bill

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops