Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

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Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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Hi

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops