roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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what do you call a black person with no legs or arms? A poor man that clearly was inflicted very badly.

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What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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Atheism

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC.

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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