A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

What do you call a man with no arms? Disabled... some people can be so cruel.

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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