Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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Why did the man wear a mask He had low self-esteem, and was ashamed of his facial appearance

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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