Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

what did the fart say to the butt........bye

Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

How does a printer work? You plug it in.

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

Funeral... You can't spell it without FUN

A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

Knock Knock Who's there

What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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