Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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Half life 3 confirmed

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage.

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops