There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch pórn daily.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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My mom was telling my brother how much it hurt when she stubbed her toe. He told her she should try child birth.

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so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Pianos.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

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What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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