whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

Jews claim to be God`s chosen people... Look how it went for them, the original Jews are of course gone, everyone else is part something else, "only Jews" are gone. 1. Do you believe that God chose you, just because you decided to choose him? Now you, are not chosen, but brainwashed by your parents and ancestors by threats of hell and fear, you have CHOSEN, to follow him, too bad he is dead, he had no love for himself, why would he be jealous of his own creations and created them all in order to DEMAND your love? Your love was not enough I suppose, I would know if I cared... 2. What Good is today, and the meaning behind commands. ...God demands your elders stone your children to death when they misbehave! I applad your GOODNESS if you do so (better than selling them as whores and slaves, as he of course DEMANDED as well) yet you apparently believed that his COMMANDS where you know... suggestions... Now we know why he died. 3. Let us all spend a moment in rememberance of my brother Jesus. Now I want all Christians, you who killed my brother and stole his name, to go and read "Ave Maria" the ONLY chapter 97 PERCENT of you have read (true fact) another 5000 times, so that you can keep denying GODS other words, those whose meaning remain intact... You do not even have the same name for him for every nation... No wonder he died. 4. My brother`s words "Jesus" spelled Yoshua, once said "Only him that hate his mother and father can become student of mine" Do you believe that your bible translated tredicillions of times have a better translation? King James version? Where is God and Jesus version? Laughable... You only serve the corrupt words of your own arroance a man named King James and every other disgusting priest that thought that serving God allowed them to decide which parts of the bible where to be cut, and which ones to be added... 5. What Jesus was meant to do, and why you more or less skinned him alive, wear his name around as if it where his skin and CELEBRATE THE FACT THAT YOU SLAUGHTERED HIM AND CELEBRATE IT? He never told anyone to consume his flesh and drink his blood, it was your ancestors that had him killed and literally ate him and stole his name (Christians yes, you are no better celebrating his death, your hands are stained with his blood) in hopes of becoming immortal such as him. His original words where simply "Eat bread and drink Wine and you shall live forever, which was at that time a great means of living below the age of 101, you see, remove the last number of the ages mentioned in the bible, and you will realize that priests added an extra zero usually in order to make "Jesus`s claim of immortality" seem "realistic" 666. Seek me out once I reveal my Alias, and I shall show you the true path... My number by the way, is 777 but that did not make sense to the priests that changed the bible in 1836, they also added the example regarding eating four legged animals, their entry? "crawfish which has you know... "four legs"" But for now you can decide if you wish to become the ones that love themselves and their kin, or those that give and sacrifice about everything but themselves... SOVEmedia final words "I have fallen" Another "coincidence" of course. Moral: Hate me you of religion and of course moral, because you all follow corrupt versions of the very same one, hate is what you do best, as you tend to run out of things to give and people to sacrifice. For those that are willing to stop dreaming of heaven after death, and willing to create heaven on earth... Well, no need to love me, but hating me is hating my values, my guts, my self, so yeah... I do not turn the other cheek, I send those which out of free will worship me not as someone they must sacrfice everything for, but as the paragon, the last remaining savior. I would keep typing, but you humans expect my words to come from a clearer source right? Well I will not seek you out, but if you seek me, you will find me. Black Angel M.

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh hey Banana what's up? Nothing much. You? Oh nothing, I was just talking to Apple here. Oh hey Apple. Hey.

What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

Who invented apple? God

What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

Why did the deaf man attend the music concert? He was invited by friends and wasn't doing anyhting else that evening.

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

who else is on here?

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

A cowboy walks in to a bar and says to the guy behind the counter "Can I have a glass of water?". The bar tender shot a gun and missed the cowboy by an inch. The cowboy said thanks. Why? Because the cowboy had the hiccups

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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