"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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Why do black poeple like fryed chicken? Becuase it greases there insides just like there outsides.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Tucker Rivera

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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why did you poop because you are a poop

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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read this sentence again.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Guest what in the butt

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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