Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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what did the lawyer say to the lawyer? "whats up lawyer?" what did the banana say to the banana? nothing bananas dint talk...

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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What's white and has a crusty nose? Luke Lange

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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Why do gingers smell so bad? So the blind can hate them too

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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say it ten times fast: oh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops