Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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a man walked into a bar.the bar was metal and he cracked his skull

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A japanese man enters a Honda dealership and is approached by an eager salesman. The salesman shows him a few models and then asks him curiously "What do they call Honda in Japan?" The japanese man answered "Honda"

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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A couple of years back a went to chile for a day, I was then trapped underground for 70 days...

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They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why was the black man carrying the television away from the store? He bought it

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Male leadership.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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Dennis: you can make anything out of coppersulfate Austin: But copper sulfate can make things out of you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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