Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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21

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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