I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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0 1 this is a sad sad world.

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your face

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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...................__ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( BroFist

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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