Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue this doesn't rhyme i like trains.

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

Q: What's the best part of having sex with twenty-seven year olds? A: By age twenty-seven the average person has reached sexual maturity, and has also developed mentaly enough to understand, and subsequently process the intimate nature of an adult relationship.

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

69

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...