Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? 9/11

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Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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