Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

When life gives you a pack of Kools, make Kool-Aid.

What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

women's rights.

everyone dislike the first joke on page one

What does the kitty say to his owner? you've CAT to KITTEN right MEOW

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

Yo momma so stupid, she's stupider than this joke.

How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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