Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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hellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohello

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

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Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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