A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one. Any more than that and they would just be getting in each others way.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do we call Osama? Osama

thumb_up thumb_down -34

hi jonny

thumb_up thumb_down -34

what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is cowboy say

thumb_up thumb_down -34

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What did the chubby, dirty, hobo get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -36

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

thumb_up thumb_down -36

There once was a man from Nantucket.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

haha

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops