Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

Dead girls can't say no.

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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