Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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read this sentence again.

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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name one pop artist who's better than Michael Jackson that's really hard. there's so many

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What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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