"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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DAAAAAAAAMN! I AM BEHIND THE SQUARE WHEEL AGAIN! AND THAT SHIT IS POINTY! PRETENDING TO CARE IS SUCH A HASSLE! Anyway, I hope you know I was joking (otherwise you would totally be,not as smart as I thought) but yeah lets see, I am the fourth most pointless MAN, after "The square wheel", "My wife" (:)) I guess some guy just married the wrong wife huh?) And the the fucking wheel is a billion times more manly than Justin Bible or whatever you called that... Thing, and that wheel is made from a female tree! What? HAVE THE LAST COMMENT? I DO NOT GET HAVE! I GET TAKE BY FORCE! Well as far as comments and go, and sex of course.

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Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

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My peni s

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Why a frog can fly? It has magic. Why a snake can fly? It ate the magic frog. Why a eagle can fly? It has wings.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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What's funnier than a joke book? 2 joke books.

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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