Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

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How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the food supply was scarce

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What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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Sometimes while i am play my music loudly in my apartment my neighbor knocks on the wall He is slowly losing his grip on reality and believes the wall is a door

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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what comes in tube and smells like toothpaste? toothpaste

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

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A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops