why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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