What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

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Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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