What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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Now this bible thing, is a real anti joke so get ready to have your faith tested, and overcome it: There was that story where God charged against an army at the top of some mountains, the army is told to have been led with God personally at the front rank right? But they lost because the enemy had horse wagons (you know what I mean) made of steel or iron, (does not matter what it is if you ask yourself really) I mean even if it was Metatron, he would have had uh... Wings or something to even the odds, Maybe God is like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, he needs to become a Mortal in order to enter fights on earth... MORTAL KOMBAAAT! I mean God made humans humans made Sin (gotta say we get the blame for a lot of shit others did, I hate apples and cant even stand the smell of them for once, never ate one)

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

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What happened to the dog that ate to much? It became obese.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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There are two cows standing in a field eating grass. The first cow says "moo", the second cow says "Thats funny, I was about to say that".

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Birdie Birdie in the Sky, Left a message in my eye ... So I shot the little bitch

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What do you call a terrible Therapist that shoots coke up his nose? Sickman, Sickman Fraud.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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how many baby's does it take to clean paint your house red. depends on the quality of the crusher.

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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