A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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What's brown and sticky A stick

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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What happened to the man who grew into the couch? He was surgically removed and forced to exercise daily. He is feeling much better now.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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